Parent Conference Day.

I never get any calls to sub for parent conferences. I can't understand why not. For my regular $91 fee I would gladly tell any parent how deeply their children had disappointed me. For an additional fee I could even be convinced to tell parents that their child has a promising future.

But no, another parent conference day come and gone and here I am sitting at home listening to my favorite radio show and waiting for the Cardinals to win the world series.

St. Louis Public School Teachers need to wake up to the limitless possibilities afforded them by vast, talented pool of local substitutes. Not looking forward to that department meeting? Hire a sub. Lunch duty got you down? Call on a sub. I'll go so far as to offer myself as a sub, free of charge, for any homecoming chaperone jobs. Let me know.